I got this past security in Glasgow no problem:
I just stuck it in my trouser pocket!
That's kind of the situation I imagined:
At security:
- HOLD ON A MINUTE, SIR! What's that you've got in your pocket?
- Got in my pocket? Obviously you have never seen a very well-endowed man before. Are you harassing me? Are you discriminating me on grounds of my physical features??
- Ok ok ok. Move along, will you.
In the hall:
- HEY, YOU! YEAH, YOU WITH THE BIG LENS! YE CAN'T TAKE NO PICTURES IN HERE, MATE!
- Pictures? This a medical device to assist my vision as I am 99% blind on my left eye. Is that a problem? Are you discriminating me on grounds of my physical disability??
- Oh, I'm terribly sorry. Hey, why don't you come to the front where the view is better?