A trumpeter died and went to heaven where he was welcomed by St Peter
who asked him if he would like to join the heavenly Orchestra. The
trumpeter said that he was hoping for a rest as it was getting more
difficult to keep his embouchure going. St Peter said “No pressure but
come and see a rehearsal.” So they went into the hall and there was
Haifetz on first violin, Albert Salmon on viola, Casals on cello, Dennis
Brain in the horns etc. The trumpeter turned to St Peter and said
“Forget what I said. It would be an honour to play in such an orchestra,
but who is the conductor, I don’t recognise him?” St Peter replies “Oh
that’s God, he thinks he’s Klemperer.”
